Ignorance Is Bliss

*Photo by Kevin


Ignorance is bliss. Isn't it? I used to fight ignorance. The more I knew, the less uninformed I could be and the less opportunity to turn a blind eye. I'm beginning to feel these days, I mean really feel, how much easier it is for my heart and general sanity, to remain untouched by the wrongs in the world. After all isn't this why we choose to watch The Bachelor instead of the news? I'm not pointing fingers here. I DO this.

I've been working for a year and half in a field where people lie to me, a lot. The fact that they lie to me can often mean that they are fighting, the only way they know how, for the ones they love. After some time, however, this becomes tiresome on my inner most parts, on my soul. I really love people. Like one of my favorite things to do is be with people who I love, my husband, my family, my good friends. And I really trust them. I have no reason to question their intentions or their desire to be honest with me. There are, however, a lot of people in my life who are not this for me. I'm finding that because I know that people lie, and in particular, to me, I've started questioning people's general reasons to do what they do. I question a person's intentions, I question their truthfulness, and I question my ability to be trusted. Ugh. Sitting in this feels awful. So I have to move on...

I'm learning that I have to trust in what I know. I cannot take any responsibility for those who aren't honest. All I know is that each day, I wake up because God intended for that to happen. I get ready in the morning preparing myself physically and emotionally for a pretty long and generally hard day. I pray in the car ride over that God will give me strength that I know I don't have. I get to work and work, as best as I know how, with as much energy as I am able and with as much respect and love for others as possible. I go home and I love my husband, who was made for me (and may I add, what a good match that has been for my soul).

And then reflect.

What did I do with my day that was purposeful and filled with love, grace, and compassion? At the end of the day, I need to know that somehow I made a difference, whether it was eventful or mundane, filled with "are you kidding me? did that just happen?" moments or "wow, I'm getting no where" moments. I can know that I have purpose because I'm living for the One who can fulfill all needs.

Ignorance sure is bliss, kind of. Life really is not life if you are not living in reality. Right???

Its Christmas

It’s Christmas. One of the parts about Christmas that is inspiring to me is that people seem to be a bit more generous. Food banks are more fully stocked, shelters have people serving food, and families receive gifts from others who can supply them. It’s consistently the one time of year that people are more apt to spread tidings of comfort and joy. It reminds me of why we celebrate. Over 2,000 years ago, as a way to honor his arrival on earth, a group of foreign kings brought a sweet baby gifts. His name was Jesus.

Most would not argue that Jesus was born, grew up to become a carpenter, and then died in his 30s an excruciating death. What is argued, is if this man was God. Although this is the pivotal point in whether or not one would identify as a Christian, I love that no matter our belief, Jesus did some pretty sweet stuff during his life on this earth in meeting the physical, emotional, and spiritual needs of others. Here’s one of my favorite stories.

Jesus went to the Mount of Olives, a mountain ridge in east Jerusalem. While in the temple courts teaching, a group of religious men walked in with a woman who they caught having sex with someone who was not her husband. The man they did not bring in. The religious men stood her up in front of Jesus and all others present so that she could be cast away and stoned.

Jesus, seeing the pain on her face, bent down to the ground and wrote in the dirt with his finger. It is unknown what it is that he wrote. One theory: maybe he wrote the sins of those standing there: murder, gossip, greed, pride. Then he said to them, any one of you who has never done something you regret, never missed the mark, or never made a mistake that you wish you could take back, you stay. Stay and throw the first stone. He began writing on the ground again. Rage, lying, jealousy.

One at a time, the oldest first and the youngest next, walked away. Until Jesus and the woman stood side by side.

Jesus asked her, “Has no one condemned you?”
“No one, sir”
“Then neither do I condemn you. Go now and leave your life of sin.”

When others had reason by law to chastise this woman, Jesus offered grace and provision. "Go", be free, but make some changes so that you will live life abundantly. One where your joy will increase and where you will be who you were created to be, God's daughter, whom he picked since the beginning of time.

Kibera Jewelry

I wrote a post a while back about one of my experiences in Kenya from almost a year ago. Since this post: Kibera I have connected with Michael Nyangi, the founder of Lomoro Microfinance Institution (MFI) in Kibera. With the help of my husband, my mother, and several everyday models, a catalog has been developed to help expand the Kibera residents' market to sell jewelry pieces. If you would like to help benefit families in one of the largest slums in the world, please view the catalog. Info about how to order is at the end. You can also email KiberaJewelryInfo@gmail.com for any questions.

View Catalog below:

Kibera Jewelry Catalog

Today

Right now my husband is sleeping in Iowa in his car on his way back from a two week long photo road trip. What has been unbelievable and slightly ironic about being separated from him for two weeks is that I've been inspired by who he is and his giftedness. Along his road trip, he has taken the opportunity to document people's lives with his photography.

Here's his latest post about his grandmother:
Trudy

When I called the doctor for some reason or another, after [Wally] had passed on about six months, he said,

“Trudy, I asked your husband to come in for tests, I wanted to do a biopsy on him, and he told me he didn’t have time.”

Living for today seems to have more meaning after experiencing some of that moment Kevin had with his grandmother. It is my prayer for you and for me that Today will be divinely motivated.

No longer forward nor behind
I look in hope and fear;
But, grateful, take in the good I find,
The best of now and here.
~ John G. Whittier

At this moment

At this moment, I am incredibly thankful for the opportunities that have been offered me. At this moment, I am a little scared of what's to come. At this moment, I'm here.

I feel a bit nostalgic thinking on the last couple of years. They've been some of the hardest I've experienced for a number of reasons. Yet, I think because of that, I've learned a lot about myself and others.

I've learned that its always just a little more complicated than it may look on the surface... for the 8th grader who bullies; for the 8th grader who's bullied; about the complexities of being a foster/adoptive parent in our system; about the complexities of being a biological parent in our system; about the complexities and impacts of adoption, domestic and international; and about people - we are always way more complicated than it may look on the surface and I for one, need to offer more grace and forgiveness.

Life is actually really hard. I've learned that each day is new, one with opportunities or obstacles. And many times those can be interchanged simply by my mood and desire.

My husband will love me no matter what. These last two years have been hard on my friendships and my relationship with my husband. We haven't had a lot of time together, yet, he has been the biggest supporter of me. Spending more time with him is one of my most favorite reasons why graduation is going to be so much sweeter in a week.

I can actually do this. I've been given gifts and talents that are purposed for serving others. Despite my insecurities and feelings of not believing that I can change the world in some small way, I can. "And now to him who can keep you on your feet, standing tall in his bright presence, fresh and celebrating... be glory, majesty, strength..". I believe God will keep me upright, on my feet, even when it feels like I might be navigating with blind eyes. I'll have a guide.

People, even the ones who may do things that I may never understand, are all hurting, growing, and worthy of a second chance. I know that sounds a bit idealistic, but I feel it to be true. I've met a mother this last year who was struggling to provide adequately for herself and her children. She did something that resulted in her children being removed from her care. 6 months later, she's getting her life together and is getting healthy for her kids. What if she wasn't given that opportunity? What if people looked at her as if she were worth nothing more than the things she's done and never gave her an opportunity to change? Then we'd have a lot of people walking around who had nothing to live for.

Let me tell you, words cannot express how happy I am that these two years are done. That I'm graduating and can go out and do what I love to do. Despite my sheer joy that I never have to write another paper about trauma or complete a case plan for a "fake" family, I am utterly thankful for my experiences in grad school, even the bad ones. Never thought I'd say that but it's true.

Congratulations to all the wonderful people I have met these past two years who have dedicated themselves to others. I'm so thankful to have met all of you and wish you many blessings!

A weekend full of emotion

This weekend is special for me. Not just because I get to hangout with family & friends, dye Easter eggs, and wear a pretty dress, but because it has meaning, significance, and an authenticity that reminds me about why I choose to value what I do.

To some, faith, true all-encompassing faith, sounds quite ridiculous or maybe even intellectually deficient. To me, believing that God has meaning and significance in my life, that he has provided purpose and motivation, and that he would offer grace, love, and forgiveness, is simply the most important thing I will ever know or feel.

Tomorrow, we will celebrate the life of a man who above all else, saw people for who they could be, for who they were made to be, and for who they would someday be. We celebrate the life of a man, who being in very nature God, offered hope for a better future. One where there will be no more pain, anxiety, depression, guilt, wrong-doing, inequity, or weeping.

There is a song that an amazing song writer (Randy Pearce) wrote that seems to sum up this man. Some of the lyrics are below:

Listen here

Come and see, what he has done for us.
Giving hope and peace where there was none.
Taking off, the chains of yesterday.
The past behind, embrace a brand new day.

Thanks be to Him who knows all, is in all, and understands all.

If you are interested in attending an Easter Service this weekend stop by at Flatirons Church in Lafayette.

Thoughts on December 11th in Kenya

Day 10: Friday, December 11th, 2009

•Begin to build a house for a needy community member, selected by the community themselves
•Participate in buying of the baskets and financial training

I was fortunate today to be able to participate in building a house for a widow in the Kasigau community. Together, with the community, we hauled bricks and trekked up part of a mountain to fetch rocks for the house’s foundation. Others walked down the road and through bush to fetch sand. And others made bricks using the brick machine. While completing these laborious tasks, I couldn’t help but think of how creative this community must be in order to survive. They truly live off only the resources found around them, as all products used in the making of the house are within walking distance or else not utilized.

This idea is very different than the consumption and commercial practices in the U.S. Much of what is used in daily life is imported from other countries or other parts of the country. It is rare that we use products from our own backyards. Consequently, this has made me quite frivolous in my own consumption. I take a longer shower if I’ve had a long day. I eat a snack simply because it’s available. I use paper products more than I should. Why? Because I don’t have to see where the trash goes; I put it in my garbage on Thursday evenings and when I come home Friday, it’s gone.

Natural resources are of great significance in Africa and a large part of a great author, Wangari Maathai’s, discussion. Africa has many resources, many of which they themselves cannot use because of a lack of education or financial resource. Additionally, Africa has relied extensively on raw materials in their trade which little is paid. She speaks of an Ethiopian economist Fantu Cheru:

“Africa has failed to capitalize successfully on the natural resources that have always been so evident to the rich world. He points a finger at a number of problems: lack of political will, weak institutions, a shortage of skills, too many ties to former colonial powers, and inadequate infrastructure, transport, and communication networks.”

How this affects rural communities:

“… the money brought to rural areas through the sale of commodities such as cash crops is then siphoned back to the towns where the consumer goods are transported from, and eventually repatriated to the countries that produce them. Even most of the industries that are located in Kenya – tourism, and the growing of flowers, coffee, and tea – are largely owned by foreign companies.”

[side note: I had to look up the meaning of repatriated and although you probably know its meaning, I'll share it with you: to send back to one's own country]

The siphoning of money back to the cities and outside owners often leaves rural communities with little economic gain. The community in Kasigau has a solution to this issue. The women in the community have begun making kiondos (baskets) as a means to economic sustainability. Starting with a native plant, Sisal, and using resources from outside their own community only minimally, the women in the community are able to creatively generate income for their families (when interviewed, all of the women said that they would use the profits from the baskets to help pay for school fees for their children).

This evening we set aside baskets to bring home to sell for the women. Although, a slightly confusing practice, as business practices between our group and the community differed, the women set aside 100 baskets for our group to bring home and sell. Additionally, each group member bought several baskets during our stay.

I hope great things for the women of Kasigau. Their artistic and beautiful baskets are symbolic of their creativity and strong spirits.

Since this entry, I have been blown away at the willingness and compassion evident within people to help fulfill the needs of others. With the help of those willing to purchase kiondos in the US, over $2,000 of profit was created for these women.

*Mom, you are amazing. Thank you for all of your help in this. You've shown an incredible desire and ability to help create change on behalf of this community, thank you.

What this really means is that 68 children will be able to attend primary school for one term (3 months). Or 17 children will be able to attend school for a full year.

Pretty incredible. These women, for the most part on their own, have been able to create a uniquely, well-crafted, and desired product that can help build a future for their children. This future will include the fulfillment of needs, less sickness and disease, and further sustainability in many areas for this community. I find great joy in the fact that this product, this business, is something that these women have created themselves, and with a little help along the way, they, themselves are creating a better future for their families. With an education, these children will be able to read and can then get a higher paying job. One that will lead to greater quality of life, less fear, and more equity.

These women are exceptional. I hope and pray that this will create life change for these women and their families.


Video on Kasigau Basket Weavers - created by MaryBeth Caudle-Brooks, a student on the trip